He looks like when God asked him to leave heaven, God said, "Dexter, I know you got that crazy funk and you're bringing it all up in here, but now I need you to go out there, beyond the gates of heaven to spread that mean ol' funk of yours, okay?"
And Dexter said, "My man, you speak the truth. There are bruthas and sistas whose eyes are closed to the Lord cuz they ain't experienced that glorious funk that can change their lives. And I'm gonna find those people and touch 'em so they can be saved in the name of our righteous Lord and the Funky Revolution." So he packed up his electronic keyboard and an assortment of velvet suits and mock turtlenecks, picked his fro nice and high, and strutted out of those gates to spread the funk in the name of the Lord.
As the gates closed behind Dexter, St. Peter whispered to God, "You are aware that by funk, he thinks you're talking about music, right?"
"I don't care what that moron thinks," said God. "My crotch and everyone else's has been itching like a mah'fucker ever since that guy got here, so he can go on and spread his nasty funk someplace else."
22 comments:
Lamont! You big dummy!
Contrary to popular belief, this picture was not taken with the camera tilted at an angle. Actually, his right leg is 1' 3" shorter than his left. The camera was horizontal as the photo was taken. Because of this, his family and close friends always use the nickname of 'Goober' for him. The reason for this nickname is not known, but is used frequently and with many other perjoratives. i.e. 'Stupid' Goober, 'Fucking' Goober, Goober 'McCloud', Goober 'The Haircut King', etc.
He lost the partial portion of his leg in a Bicycle accident when he was 14 yrs. old, because he did not wear his helmet, or other safety equipment, and was caught in a terrible crash involving a Little Red Wagon which was being pulled by a dog, with a girl in the back who had obviously wet her pants, but was denying it to anyone that would listen. She also would not relinquish her seat in the back of the Little Red Wagon, no matter what.
So let this be a lesson, kids. Always wear your safety equipment, or forever be known as 'Goober'.
Ja Rule's father was recently spotted at a popular New York deli buying a baker's dozen of bagels and lox. When asked how he felt about various topics including Ja's beef with rapper 50Cent and his latest single "New York, New York"--he responded as he often does..."nigga, please."
The reason why the picture looks foggy is because Al "Afro 2" Elliot was found floating at the bottom of a fish tank in Tucson Arizona. His picture was taken by a 9 year old girl who later told reporters that she thought it was "a real dressed up grouper".
Afro 2 a singer for the popular barbershop band Pick and his Four Afro's. Afro 2 wanting more spot light...he wanted to be first chair named aptly "Afro 1". To do this he decided he need to get a "bigger do". Not able to affored this on his wage of bar peanuts and back washed beer he had to seek help from a local mob agent.
Afro 2 had a beatiful new do! The band had new gigs and it was going well except Afro 2 never got the first chair of the Afro's due to his bad beer breath. When the mob came to collect the 80 dollars he owed them Afro 2 could only offer a bowl of stale peanuts and a half drunk beer left by a bar whore.
The the loan shark pissed off at Afro 2's offer was heard to say "he'll sleep wit da fishes" of course no ocean peer to throw him off of in Arizona they chose a local fish tank in a chinese resturant that has a all you can eat buffet for $2.00 something Afro 2 could never aford.
This man has so much Soul that he actually bends light. The camera was physically destroyed in the process of taking this picture (thus the skewed angle).
he looks like lionel ritchie's second cousin's girlfriend's auntie's half brother.
He looks like after losing his job as a card carrying member of Earth,Wind, and Fire, Tyrone Jacobs, hopes that updating his Photo portfolio with that session at Glamour Shots(seen here), it will land him a spot as the new Bass player for The Commodores ReUnion Tour.
haahahaahahaahahaahahaaha.....
can't stop laughing. you are crazy and im adding you to my links.
*laughing some more...
maybe send you pictures to analyze as well...
*still laughing...
Strom Thurmond's first words upon ariving in Heaven were "Oh, shit!"
do you want to shine like me ?, do you want yo hair to be so brite its dynamite brotha ? well buy some soul glo, if you want to strut like a real turkaay.
Billy Dee Williams exits the tilt-a-whirl
Luscious DiAmante...the finest pimp to have ever slapped a 'ho. A man so smooth, he was born in a velvet suit...
He looks like a ghost in a Twilight Zone episode of the LOVE BOAT, serving drinks to all who approach him, and playing a deck of cards for a game of 21.
Lamont Sanford committed suicide by drowning himself in a bowl early this morning.
Jerome Richards, a close family and photographer, arranged for this "Glamour Shots" photo to be taken on the scene. "It was a little difficult to get the shot while his face was all up inside that fishbowl. I finally tilted the tripod, you know like a little like a gansta lean, and I got a great shot. The family seemed pretty happy", Richards said. When asked why the actor put his face inside the fishbowl, Richards quickly replied "what cha talkin' about"?
Heeeeyyy! Isn't that the bartender guy from "Love Boat"???
OK they never told me that I would be able to see this well. Damned Angels!! SO I must be black, RIGHT ON!!! Last time I was a skinny white kid livin out in Newcastle. Hey I wonder if I'm in Alabama? God I hope not, the school systems suck there. Hey but at least I will know how to dance. Ooooh, I think I just wet my nappie, WAAAAAAAAA, mamma come over here and feed me, cause life number 12 has just begun!
Nice blog, keep up the good work!
I have a site to card credit debt government help.
It's a free information site on card credit debt government help.
You should check it out if you have the time :-)
So many blogs and only 10 numbers to rate them. I'll have to give you a 10 because you have done a good job. Great Job,
Free Access To More Information Aboutbusiness license
Just wanted to tell you that you have a great blog here! It's being bookmarked!
I have a commercial loan
related site too. It covers a lot of finance and commercial loan
associated topics.
You're most welcome to check it out :-)
Hey, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!
I have a Credit Cards Low Interest Rates site. It pretty much covers Credit Cards Low Interest Rates related stuff.
Come and check it out if you get time :-)
Hey, Just came across your capital one home loans blog. Great work indeed. I also have a capital one home loans that may interest your readers. Would love you to stop by for feedback
Asbestos is the
name given to a group of minerals that occur naturally
in the environment as bundles of fibers
Exposure to asbestos may increase the risk of asbestosis, lung cancer,
Mesothelioma
other cancers, and other nonmalignant lung and pleural
disorders .
Smokers who are also exposed to Asbestos have a
greatly increased risk
of lung cancer .
Individuals who have been exposed (or suspect they have been exposed)
to asbestos fibers on the job, through the environment, or at home via
a family contact should inform their physician of their exposure
history and any symptoms .
Government agencies can provide additional information on Asbestos exposure.
What is Asbestos
Asbestos is the
name given to a group of minerals that occur naturally
in the environment as bundles of fibers and can be separated into
thin, durable threads. These fibers are resistant to heat, fire, and
chemicals and do not conduct electricity. For these reasons, asbestos
has been widely used in many industries.
There are two subgroups of Asbestos
chrysotile, which has curly
fibers and is in the serpentine family of minerals; and amphibole
asbestos, which has straight, needle-like fibers and includes
actinolite, tremolite, anthophyllite, crocidolite, and amosite
asbestos. Chrysotile Asbestos is the form
that has been used
predominantly in commercial applications worldwide .
How is Asbestos
used
Asbestos was
mined and used commercially in North America beginning in
the late 1800s. Its use increased greatly during World War II . Since
then, Asbestos
has been used in many industries. For example, the
building and construction industry has used it for strengthening
cement and plastics as well as for insulation, roofing, fireproofing,
and sound absorption. The shipbuilding industry has used asbestos to
insulate boilers, steampipes, and hot water pipes. The automotive
industry uses Asbestos in vehicle
brakeshoes and clutch pads. Asbestos
has also been used in ceiling and floor tile; paints, coatings, and
adhesives; and plastics. In addition, asbestos has been found in
vermiculite-containing consumer garden products and some
talc-containing crayons.
In the late 1970s, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC)
banned the use of Asbestos in
wallboard patching compounds and gas
fireplaces because the Asbestos fibers in
these products could be
released into the environment during use. Additionally, in 1979,
manufacturers of electric hairdryers voluntarily stopped using
asbestos in their products. In 1989, the U.S. Environmental Protection
Agency (EPA) banned all new uses of Asbestos uses
established prior
to 1989 are still allowed. The EPA also established regulations that
require school systems to inspect for damaged Asbestos and to
eliminate or reduce the exposure to occupants by removing the asbestos
or encasing it.
In June 2000, the CPSC concluded that the risk of children’s exposure
to Asbestos fibers
in crayons was extremely low (1). However, the U.S.
manufacturers of these crayons agreed to eliminate talc from their
products. In August 2000, the EPA responded to reports it received
about the adverse human health effects associated with exposure to
asbestos-contaminated vermiculite by conducting a series of tests to
evaluate the extent of the risk. The investigation concluded that
the potential exposure to Asbestos from some
vermiculite products
poses only a minimal health risk to consumers. The EPA recommended
that consumers reduce the low risk associated with the occasional use
of vermiculite during gardening activities by limiting the amount of
dust produced during use. Specifically, the suggested that
consumers use vermiculite outdoors or in a well-ventilated area; keep
vermiculite damp while using it; avoid bringing dust from vermiculite
use into the home on clothing; and use premixed potting soil, which is
less likely to generate dust.
The regulations described above and other actions, coupled with
widespread public concern about the health hazards of Asbestos, have
resulted in a significant annual decline in U.S. use of Asbestos
Domestic consumption of Asbestos amounted to
about 803,000 metric tons
in 1973, but it had dropped to about 2,400 metric tons by 2005 .
What are the health hazards of exposure to Asbestos
People may be exposed to Asbestos in their
workplace, their
communities, or their homes. If products containing Asbestos are
disturbed, tiny Asbestos fibers are
released into the air. When
Asbestos fibers are
breathed in, they may get trapped in the lungs and
remain there for a long time. Over time, these fibers can accumulate
and cause scarring and inflammation, which can affect breathing and
lead to serious health problems .
Asbestos has been
classified as a known human carcinogen (a substance
that causes cancer) by the U.S. Department of Health and Human
Services, the EPA, and the International Agency for Research on
Cancer. Studies have shown that exposure to Asbestos may increase
the
risk of lung cancer and Mesothelioma (a
relatively rare cancer of the
thin membranes that line the chest and abdomen). Although rare,
Mesothelioma is
the most common form of cancer associated with
Asbestos exposure.
In addition to lung cancer and Mesothelioma some
studies have suggested an association between Asbestos exposure and
gastrointestinal and colorectal cancers, as well as an elevated risk
for cancers of the throat, kidney, esophagus, and gallbladder .
However, the evidence is inconclusive.
Asbestos exposure
may also increase the risk of Asbestos (a chronic
lung disease that can cause shortness of breath, coughing, and
permanent lung damage) and other nonmalignant lung and pleural
disorders, including pleural plaques (changes in the membrane
surrounding the lung), pleural thickening, and pleural effusions
(abnormal collections of fluid between the thin layers of tissue
lining the lung and the wall of the chest cavity). Although pleural
plaques are not precursors to lung cancer, evidence suggests that
people with pleural disease caused by Asbestos exposure may
be at
increased risk for lung cancer .
Who is at risk for an Asbestos related
disease?
Everyone is exposed to Asbestos at some time
during their life. Low
levels of Asbestos
are present in the air, water, and soil. However,
most people do not become ill from their exposure. People who become
ill from Asbestos
are usually those who are exposed to it on a regular
basis, most often in a job where they work directly with the material
or through substantial environmental contact.
Since the early 1940s, millions of American workers have been exposed
to Asbestos Health
hazards from Asbestos fibers have
been recognized
in workers exposed in shipbuilding trades, Asbestos mining and
milling, manufacturing of asbestos textiles and other Asbestos
products, insulation work in the construction and building trades, and
a variety of other trades. Demolition workers, drywall removers,
asbestos removal workers, firefighters, and automobile workers also
may be exposed to Asbestos fibers.
However, recent studies do not
support an increased risk of lung cancer or Mesothelioma among
automobile mechanics exposed to asbestos through brake repair . As a
result of Government regulations and improved work practices, today’s
workers (those without previous exposure) are likely to face smaller
risks than did those exposed in the past.
Those involved in the rescue, recovery, and cleanup at the site of the
September 11, 2001, attacks on the World Trade Center (WTC) in New
York City are another group at risk of developing an Asbestos related
disease. Because Asbestos was used in
the construction of the North
Tower of the WTC, when the building was attacked, hundreds of tons of
asbestos were released into the atmosphere. Those at greatest risk
include firefighters, police officers, paramedics, construction
workers, and volunteers who worked in the rubble at Ground Zero.
Others at risk include residents in close proximity to the WTC towers
and those who attended schools nearby. These populations will need to
be followed to determine the long-term health consequences of their
exposure .
One study found that nearly 70 percent of WTC rescue and recovery
workers suffered new or worsened respiratory symptoms while performing
work at the WTC site. The study describes the results of the WTC
Worker and Volunteer Medical Screening Program, which was established
to identify and characterize possible WTC-related health effects in
responders. The study found that about 28 percent of those tested had
abnormal lung function tests, and 61 percent of those without previous
health problems developed respiratory symptoms. However, it is
important to note that these symptoms may be related to exposure to
debris components other than Asbestos
Although it is clear that health risks from Asbestos exposure
increase
with heavier exposure and longer exposure time, investigators have
found Asbestos
related diseases in individuals with only brief
exposures. Generally, those who develop Asbestos related
diseases show
no signs of illness for a long time after their first exposure. It can
take from 10 to 40 years or more for symptoms of an Asbestos related
condition to appear.
There is some evidence that family members of workers heavily exposed
to Asbestos
face an increased risk of developing Mesothelioma This
risk is thought to result from exposure to Asbestos fibers brought
into the home on the shoes, clothing, skin, and hair of workers. To
decrease these exposures, Federal law regulates work practices to
limit the possibility of Asbestos being brought
home in this way. Some
employees may be required to shower and change their clothes before
they leave work, store their street clothes in a separate area of the
workplace, or wash their work clothes at home separately from other
clothes .
Cases of Mesothelioma
have also been seen in individuals without
occupational exposure, but who live close to Asbestos mines or
have
been exposed to fibers carried home by family members working with
asbestos .
What factors affect the risk of developing an Asbestos related
disease?
Several factors can help to determine how asbestos exposure affects an
individual, including :
Dose (how much Asbestos an
individual was exposed to).
Duration (how long an individual was exposed).
Size, shape, and chemical makeup of Asbestos fibers.
Source of exposure.
Individual risk factors, such as smoking and pre-existing lung disease.
Post a Comment