Friday, January 07, 2005
He looks like he came out to New York City at the age of 17 to pursue a career of modeling, an aspiration he had held dear ever since Father Tilly told him that he had "the nicest lips of all the alter boys" when he was 10. He stepped off the bus with nothing more than a small backpack full of clothes, his guitar and his lifelong dreams. One look at his long brown hair bound into ponytail by a rubberband and a friend in "the biz" proclaimed, "The first step to a modeling career is good hair. Well, actually, it's a slutty disposition and a complete lack of moral scruples, but you also want to have good hair." Since he had spent most of his money on his bus ticket out and had no bankable skills with which to pay for a glamorous cut, his friend referred him to the Vidal Sasson School of Styling where he received a stylish 'do from a hairdresser trainee named Babú, a flaming Kenyan with undying allegiance to Richard Marx and large, jangly bracelets. He was horrified when he saw the resulting hair style in the mirror but Babú assured him it was hip and cool...kind of Simon LeBon meets a featherduster. His insecure, self-conscious query of "Does my hair make me look gay?" soon became his never-failing catchphrase, and people quickly tired of him, avoiding him on the streets. His efforts to break into the modeling business failed, and other than appearing in a handful of salon books of haircuts-people-never-get-but-flip-through-and-laugh-at-while-in-the-waiting-area, he went to meeting after meeting with agents who snickered and politely waved him away. He headed back to his small town to live with his parents, where he has journals upon journals filled with rageful, psychopathic entries directed at the Vidal Sasson School of Styling. Sadly, if you ask most industry insiders, they will say that it wasn't so much his eccentric hairdo that killed his career, as the fact that he was always wearing homemade shirts made from what appeared to be recycled tablecloth. He died at the age of 24 in a freak jello accident, a very bitter, bitter man.